Episodes

When was the last time you did something that made you feel slightly exposed, a little uncomfortable, but might just have opened up a whole new part of your life? In this slightly different episode of Mid-Life Men, my guest is Dom Stichbury, founder and musical director of Chaps Choir, a London-based singing gang that's been bringing men together through music, performance and friendship since 2013. And you don't have to think of yourself as a singer to get something from this conversation. Do...

Content note: This episode includes discussion of depression and suicidal thoughts. If you or someone you know is struggling with suicidal thoughts, there are organisations you can call now. In the UK, you can call the Samaritans on 116 123. In the US, you can call the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline. In Australia, call Lifeline on 13 11 14. As always, the advice is to speak to a GP or mental health professional. Martin Pemberton became a professional footballer twice, achieving the ambition that ...

Growing up with a single mother in a one-bedroom apartment on the French Riviera, Tom Papasian saw extraordinary wealth all around him but experienced a very different reality at home. As a young boy, he quietly decided that he would make enough money to ensure that neither he nor his mother ever felt financially vulnerable again. That decision shaped the next two decades of his life. Tom worked relentlessly, moved between countries and pursued one opportunity after another. Yet however much he...

Content note: This episode includes a frank discussion of depression, suicidal thoughts, a suicide attempt and psychiatric treatment. Please listen with care. If the issues raised affect you, speak to someone you trust or seek appropriate professional support. From the outside, Ian Kinnery appeared to have everything: a successful business, financial security and the status he had worked relentlessly to achieve. Behind that success, however, he felt increasingly trapped by responsibility, financ...

Everything looked successful from the outside. A thriving business. A modern apartment. A career many people would envy. Yet behind closed doors, Lewis Hackney found himself standing on a balcony, overwhelmed by the urge to jump. In this deeply honest conversation, Lewis shares the story behind that moment, what led him there, and why so many men silently find themselves questioning their purpose long before anyone else notices something is wrong. Today, Lewis has transformed those experiences ...

Most of us assume antidepressants are there to help. For many people, they do. But for Erik Peers, the experience was very different. In this deeply personal conversation, Erik shares how he was prescribed antidepressants during a stressful period in his life, despite believing he wasn't depressed. What followed was nearly ten years of medication, repeated attempts to stop, severe withdrawal, and a growing realisation that the treatment he trusted was actually keeping him trapped. Today, Erik...

From the outside, many of the men Alfie Ruffell knew looked like they were doing just fine. They were working, laughing with their mates and getting on with life. But behind the smiles, some were carrying struggles no one else could see. Several of them would later take their own lives. After experiencing his own breakdown and losing close friends to suicide, Alfie realised that awareness alone isn't enough. The real challenge is reaching the men who never say they're struggling in the first pla...

What do men really talk about when they're together? In this special crossover episode, I'm joined by the four hosts - Sean, Aaron, Mike and Niall - of the Friends in Low Places (FILP) podcast to have a candid conversation about topics they never thought they'd discuss. What follows is an honest, funny and surprisingly open conversation about the things men often avoid discussing - even with their closest friends. We explore why so many men find it difficult to open up, the unwritten rules of...

For most of our lives, we're known by what we do. Our work shapes our identity, gives us purpose and often becomes the measure of our self-worth. But what happens when that chapter ends? When the career finishes, the business is sold or retirement finally arrives, many men are left asking a question they never expected: Who am I now? George Jerjian has spent years helping people answer that question. But his own journey began after being told he had what doctors believed was a terminal ...

In this episode, we talk to Paul Drugan, who carried the emotional scars of growing up with a father who, behind closed doors, was controlling, violent and emotionally abusive. From the outside, his family looked successful and respectable. Inside the home, he was living in fear, convinced that somehow he deserved what was happening. Like many men, Paul never spoke about it. Instead, he buried the pain beneath achievement, alcohol, drugs and a lifetime of believing he wasn't good enough. It wa...

Many men spend decades chasing the next thing. The next promotion. The next pay rise. The next business success. The next milestone. The belief is simple: once I get there, I'll finally be happy. But what happens when you get there and something still feels missing? In this episode of Mid-Life Men, I talk to former CEO and executive coach Bill Williams about a question that many successful men quietly wrestle with: Why don't I feel happier? Bill shares the story of a life spent striving. From ...

In this episode, I'm joined by Ryan McGuigan, whose life, from the outside, looked like a success. He had built a thriving business from scratch, was engaged to be married, enjoyed financial stability, and seemed to be living the life many men aspire to. But beneath the surface, something felt wrong. As the physical demands of his work took their toll and cracks began to appear in his relationship, Ryan found himself facing a reality he hadn't expected. Within a short space of time, his engag...

In this episode, we hear from Brad Hill. For most of his life, from the outside, it looked like he was coping, functioning, working, getting on with life. But underneath, he was carrying things he had never really dealt with: a father who wasn't there, childhood sexual abuse, feelings of inadequacy and a growing dependence on alcohol that became his longest relationship. In this honest and powerful conversation, Brad shares how decades of buried pain, self-criticism and addiction eventually cau...

Tom Jenkins looked functional from the outside. He held down jobs, travelled the world and kept life moving forward. But underneath, he was trapped in a cycle of binge drinking, gambling, shame, self-destruction and trying to outrun himself. In this brutally honest conversation, Tom talks openly about: blackouts, cocaine and waking up in places he couldn’t remember the loneliness and low self-worth driving his behaviour erectile dysfunction, porn and why so many men suffer in silence why “h...

When Samuel Shepherd was diagnosed with a rare terminal blood cancer, doctors told him there was no treatment, no cure, and possibly very little time left. For many people, that would have been the end of the story. For Samuel, it became the beginning of an obsession. A physicist, engineer and inventor with decades of experience across biochemistry, environmental science and high-level government projects, Samuel turned all of his knowledge towards one goal: staying alive. What followed was yea...

At 47, Jack Clifford was told he had a 100% blocked LAD “widowmaker” artery and needed emergency triple bypass surgery. Instead, he walked out of the hospital. Partly because he didn’t feel like the kind of man this was supposed to happen to. Partly because he’d watched his mother suffer cognitive decline after heart surgery and was terrified of losing himself in the process. What followed was a five-year journey that completely changed how he thought about health, ageing, and survival. In t...

This episode contains an open and honest conversation about suicidal thoughts. We've chosen not to shy away from the reality of what that experience feels like because we believe that hearing it spoken about directly can help people feel less alone. If you're affected by what you hear, we'll share contact information at the end of the show notes of organisations you can reach out to right now. For a long time, Graham Noble looked like a man handling life. Career. Family. Five children. ...

Seejai was a Division I basketball player with a professional future in his sights. Then, without warning, his body started telling a different story. What he thought were manageable breathing issues became a serious heart condition, the end of the sporting path he had spent years working towards, and eventually two heart transplants. In this conversation, Seejai talks openly about the shock of watching life veer away from the plan you had in your head and the mental toll that comes with tryi...

Most men know something is wrong before anything goes seriously wrong. The sleep getting worse. The energy is not quite there. The body that used to be forgiving and now isn't. The sense that somewhere along the way, you stopped being a priority even to yourself. Dr. Ken Ro has spent decades in emergency medicine watching men arrive at crisis points that, in nearly every case, had been building for years. Not because they were careless or ignorant, but because the way men are wired - to provide...

Most men are good at one thing: Keeping going. Through stress. Through pain. Through things not quite working. Until eventually, it all starts catching up. In this episode, I’m joined by Cam Cordin, who at 44 found himself physically broken, in constant pain, his marriage collapsing, his work unstable, and at a point where he didn’t want help. Instead, he made a private contract with himself: 911 days to rebuild his body and his life, or he was out. What followed...

What if nothing is wrong in your life… but you don’t feel anything anymore? Some men don’t break down. They just go numb. They keep working, providing, showing up… but inside something has quietly switched off. In this episode I speak with Kenyada Meadows, a former Wall Street executive who calls this “hollow man syndrome” - when you look successful on the outside but feel empty inside. Kenyada talks openly about the slow realization that success doesn’t always equal fulfillment, the pressure...

Some men don’t just go through one difficult relationship. They find themselves asking a harder question: Why do I keep ending up in the same situation with different people? In this episode, Simon Verhage talks honestly about growing up feeling unheard, carrying that need for connection into adult life, and how that led him into relationships he hoped would finally give him the stability he was looking for. What makes this conversation different is how openly he talks about the pattern, not j...

In this episode I talk with Dr James Rouse, author of "No Days Off", about what that moment looked like for him. Growing up around alcohol, instability, and pressure to just get on with things, he followed a path a lot of men fall into: drinking too much, pushing himself hard physically, and trying to outrun how he felt rather than face it. Some men don’t crash. They just reach a point where they quietly think: “I can’t keep living like this.” What makes this conversation differen...

Most men deal with stress the same way: push through, stay in control, and keep going. But what if the body already has its own built-in way to release stress, and we’ve simply been taught to suppress it? In this episode I speak with Richmond Heath, a physiotherapist and one of the pioneers of Trauma Release Exercises (TRE) in Australia. Richmond’s interest in this work began with his own experience of chronic pain and high-functioning anxiety, which traditional treatments never fully resolve...