Why I Kept Trying to Make It Work, with Simon Verhage

Some men don’t just go through one difficult relationship. 

They find themselves asking a harder question: Why do I keep ending up in the same situation with different people? 

In this episode, Simon Verhage talks honestly about growing up feeling unheard, carrying that need for connection into adult life, and how that led him into relationships he hoped would finally give him the stability he was looking for. 

What makes this conversation different is how openly he talks about the pattern, not just one breakdown but several, and the difficult realisation that until he understood himself better, the same outcomes were likely to repeat. 

We talk about things many men recognise but rarely connect together: 

•  how early family dynamics can shape the partners we choose 
•  why some men stay too long trying to “make it work” 
•  how self-worth affects the relationships we accept 
•  what it takes to step away from environments that aren’t healthy 
•  simple ways to start rebuilding stability from the inside.

Simon also shares how these experiences led him to create Men’s Mind Cave, a space where men can talk openly about relationship breakdown, stress, separation, and rebuilding without feeling judged.

This episode isn’t about blaming partners or reliving the past. It’s about something more uncomfortable and more useful: recognising patterns, taking responsibility for your own direction, and learning how to stop repeating what isn’t working.

If you’ve ever found yourself thinking, "How did I end up here again?” This will probably resonate.

If you want to find out more about Simon and the Men’s Mind Cave, visit his website https://mensmindcave.co.uk/ and you can also find him on Facebook or Instagram under Men's Mind Cave.